Bowel movements come in enough varieties to fill a Dr. Seuss book. Like most Dr. Seuss (and I mean absolutely no offense by the following comparison), your poo actually contains within it many literal and figurative layers. In other words, your poo tells two stories: the literal story of its color, shape, size, and journey, and the broader, richer story of the lifestyle choices that led to such a distinct color, shape and size.

Here are some potential stories about your poo. It will be up to you to fill in the rest:

Brown poo – Brown poo is most often indicative of a normal, healthy digestive system. The brown pigment is the result of bile mixed with dead red blood cells. Brown poop quite often tells the story of a healthy body getting a good amount of fiber and water in the midst of life.

Green poo – Green poo can be the result of something like a bowel moving too quickly through the intestines to an abundance of green-colored foods in your diet. Typically, green poo is nothing to worry about, though if it’s persistently too stinky it could be telling the story of gastroenteritis or salmonella.

Big Poo – A nice, bulky poo that slips right out is the most desirable of all poos, but this poo shouldn’t be too massive. An overly large bowel movement might be indicative of too much waste building up in your digestive system (i.e. constipation). If the poo is time and again huge and uncomfortable it might be due to certain intolerances like allergy to lactose.

Mean Poo – If getting the poo out is either too much a struggle or too easy (i.e. diarrhea) it can mean sickness or that urgent changes are needed to your diet. If your find yourself straining to squeeze out a few, painful pebbles, that tells the story of unhealthy food binges and excessive coffee drinking. Diarrhea could mean dehydration or a stomach bug. When unhealthy eating is the cause of bad poo, it is essential that fiber and water are restored to the body to achieve balance.

Red Poo – Red doesn’t always equal blood when it comes to poo. Sometimes red means you ate beets for dinner. On the other hand, if you see inexplicable red in your stool it can be a sign of bleeding in the lower intestinal-tract.

Black Poo – If the poo is the color of tar, it might be time to ring some alarms. Aggressively dark pigmentation is often the result of dried blood, which would indicate that you’re bleeding somewhere internally. See a doctor just to be safe.

Smelly Poo – If your poo truly stinks to the high heavens for days in a row, then it could mean something as simple as dietary choices your making or something deeper like Crohn’s Disease. While not necessarily a code red, wretched smelling poo should raise a few internal flags regarding the food you eat.

Daddy Mack Poo – This is the grand-daddy of all great poos—the result of proper diet and exercise. It’s brown, compact, loaded with fiber and water, and it slips right out. One or two wipes and you’re done. It’s the ultimate poo. The perfect poo.









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Let’s Talk About Better Dumps

Precious few things are universal in the true sense of the word. Taking dumps is one of those precious things. Every living organism consumes energy and expels waste in some way, so the only question that remains is: why be hesitant to talk about it?

It’s nothing short of magnificent that our bodies have internal garbage mechanisms that turn energy into waste, which is then expelled. Many of us enjoy the process and have no shame in talking about it. Some of, dare I say it, even enjoy smelling the result (our own that is, not someone else’s). Plus, what isn’t a sure-fire gut-buster if not a story about a bowel movement gone horribly awry? In short, there’s nothing to be ashamed of!

Now that we’ve cleared the air (no pun intended), let’s talk about better dumps. Because just as bowel movements are universal, so are the problems related to those same bowel movements. They can be messy, unpredictable, and downright painful on occasion. Something like constipation or diarrhea can ruin a day, if not a week. In short, dumps can be spontaneous, and, vicariously, embarrassing.

Many people seek to regulate the efficiency of their bowel movements. They buy colon cleanse products and high-fiber supplements online. They try soluble powders and dietary pills. If they’re really in the know, they seek out and buy all-natural psyllium husk powder to achieve true balance in the digestive tract.

My personal go-to source for true bowel regulation is The Perfect Dump. It’s a blend of the finest, organic psyllium husk powder on the market. It doesn’t make me go to the bathroom, but when I do go, it’s as easy and predictable as the best dump can be. Since we’re speaking openly and frankly, I want to recommend The Perfect Dump, because everyone deserves a better bowel movement.

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The Wide World of Taking Dumps

Precious few things are universal in the true sense of the word. Taking dumps is one of those things. Every living organism takes in energy and expels waste in some way, so the only question that remains is: why be hesitant to talk about it?

We all take dumps. Many of us enjoy it. We enjoy taking the dump. Talking about the dump. Asking about the dump. Some of us, dare I say it, even enjoy smelling the dump. And let’s face it, few stories have as much potential for laughs as a classic tale involving a dump gone horribly awry.

Then there’s the science of the whole thing. Taking a dump is quite simply as miraculous a process as anything else the human body can muster. Imagine it: an internal garbage system that works for free every day of the week!

So the next time someone mentions their dump and you find yourself blushing, ask yourself if it’s even worth the reservation. If you need extra convincing, then log on to the Internet and do some searching, because you will quickly find that there is an entire community out there that has no qualms whatsoever talking about its dumps.

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My First Dump

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